Crimea, What Do You Need That For Dude?

Pacifism is Nothing to Hide Behind

As pacifists one might ask, how can a Dudeist not let aggression stand? Most of the time a swift “fuck it” is enough, then a string or two of bowling and all is well again. But what about those times when a Dude has to stand up for what’s right and declare “this aggression will not stand”. Where is your pacifism now Dude, when the nihilists are coming, swinging their swords?

Crimea River Man,this is the situation the world finds its self in with the crisis in Crimea, Russia having set fire to the Dude’s car by invading, now demands they get the Crimea Lebowski! By comparing this situation to the classic scene from The Big Lebowski, the final confrontation between the Dude and the nihilists, we see that this is an almost identical situation.

Two of the actors in this real life drama are equatable to the nihilists, played in this instance by Russia and Putin, and Walter played by the international community in the west. These roles are clearly defined, one could suppose that the Donny in this case would be the innocent people of the region, those that would pay the highest price if things get bad and no one can diffuse this situation. But where are the Dude’s? Stuck between two assholes and a too soft place, that’s seems to be where he ends up in the movie, and we in this derned real life drama.

Give Them the Fucking Crimea Man!

Is it really worth losing Donny and possibly our Johnsons over something we really do not need? Maybe Russia feels like it is their Johnson, in the way of Crimea, that is being bitten off by the NATO marmot? There is a lot of arguments for Crimea having and digging the Russian style. The rest of Ukraine is turning to the west, probably will turn Crimea that direction too given time, so the west can mark it eight, and call it good with that.

Using the movie as a guide, it is deducible that the Dude would just hand over Crimea and say fuck it. There will be other opportunities, other league games to play in, no need to let the Walters have their way on this one, no matter how noisy they are. Just like the nihilists Russia gambled a lot on their scheme, and are unlikely going to go away empty handed. After all they lost a toe in the form of Ukraine, in their minds they’ve invested too much to let this go. Better to let’em have our pocket change than to risk losing anything more our selves.

Former ambassador to Russia Jack Matlock Jr. makes a strong case for letting Russia have Crimea in his recent article for Time. Arguing that not only would we avoid an intractable situation that could lead to war, but that Ukraine and Crimea would be better off in the long run. Crimea is not really part of Ukraine in may ways, and holding on to the province wont do them any favors. Crimea was Russian until half a century ago, it still identifies as Russian, let them be Russian.

There are still plenty of ways to let them know what kind of human paraquats they are for scheming and plotting, sanctions that are tough enough to say “this aggression will not stand!”, but not so tough as to force them to throw a marmot in our tub. When the Dude figured out how the big Lebowski had scammed him, he was not afraid to confront him with that fact, but he was not there to harm him, in fact he still had empathy for the big Lebowski. The Dude teaches us that one can stand against aggression and still aim to do no harm.

 Whelp, that’s one Dude’s opinion. What’s Your’s, comments always welcome

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4 thoughts on “Crimea, What Do You Need That For Dude?

  1. Not being an official Dude, nor member of the Church, my viewpoint may not have much standing. Politically I feel that the United States hasn’t any right to go into any country to help nor hinder whatever form of peace, love, or hate that appears to be in the politician’s interests. Clearly after Assad made it shown not so long ago that the United States hasn’t any real pull in Syria, Putin saw in “his” country’s situation he could also do whatever he wanted without any real repercussions that could harm him. As much as the logic of love makes sense in an ideal world society, and a utopian world without need of borders and boundaries would surely be, and is, something to strive for, it cannot be done with psychotic politicians continuously in charge at some place here or there. What is happening in Crimea is a good example. My feeling was that Putin was going to do whatever he wanted in Russia because he knows how powerless the United States is. Surely the US should just keep out firstly due to it not being the US. It is probably true what Russia has done by taking (back?) what they felt was theirs was done out necessity; to rebuild the Russian Empire, Putin needed to start somewhere, and with a weakening United States and shaky global economy, human rights questions as well as issues in Syria still fresh in memories, the timing was as good as it could get. I think that the bottom line of just how far Mr. Putin will go to control as many people he can is what made Mr. Obama feel he needed to do SOME thing to show his displeasure. Yeah, what Putin did was illegal, by Ukraine’s own constitution’s words, so the UN and the US putting in sanctions were proper. But looking into President Putin’s cold eyes and unemotional face, even a chimpanzee would get the conclusion he doesn’t care and he’s not going to stop. There was a huge military build up to take over people that seemingly didn’t defend themselves and let it happen. They’ve apparently been grateful to hand over whatever freedom they had without a fight. The only ones unhappy with the goings – on are the ones who truly don’t have a say in what goes on in Russia — the rest of the civilized world. I hate to be hypocritical, myself; political battles and human rights mix like oil and water, but what if Putin decided it was in the best interest of the Crimean people to take away voting rights or worse, the unthinkable. I guess my somewhat rambling opinion here was meant to show that the unnecessary US invasion into Iraq was and is going to be seen as a standing point in the history books of how hypocritical the United States is. Our words and actions are laughed at by leaders of other countries, so there really isn’t much that can be done to avert any wars anywhere now. Love the Dude’s heart in this, but I think the fact that what Putin did was illegal and cannot be punished is what is at the core of the problem. He isn’t going to undo what has been done, or is doing (how about those new Russian street signs and two hour time change?) He won’t be arrested or charged with anything. The sanctions will only hurt the U.S., ironically, because we need the Russians to get onto the space station, and the average former Crimeans who won’t get the aid they need to survive properly. And any military action has to be off the table between two countries that, by all intents and purposes, have the ability to wipe humanity off the face of the earth. Essentially this is a problem without end, and the only way to keep it from getting worse is to allow Putin to continue breaking the law.

  2. I agree that a violent response to Putin’s aggression in the Crimea would be un-Dudelike.

    Putin sees the Ukraine, particularly East and South Ukraine, as a rug that really tied the room together. The U.S. pissed on it with their meddling. I’m thinking that he’ll go after it.

    We may say, hey, it’s not your rug, man. But it sure isn’t ours.

    Abide, Dude.

  3. I feel like the owner of this site knows nothing about dudeism or politics and is only using it to peddle his shitty overpriced glass.

    He is the true nihilist, the leach that attaches to a philosophy, the evangelist of the Christians, and smothers it with bullshit and attempts at profit.

    The dude wouldn’t be blogging on politics to sell glass is all I’m saying.

    Abide, Dude

    • The Dude helped write the Port Huron Statement, basically blogging about politics in his time and place. And while I am sure he got paid, being a roadie for Metallica, or selling glass, is not going to buy anyone a Mercedes.

      Everyone is welcome to their opinion man, I have several, but even as opinionated as I am I will not be drawn into a “no true Scotsman” debate.

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